When Your House Is Closing In On You: A Lesson In Decluttering

Space is one of those things that just about anybody would say they need more of. However, most of us can't buy bigger homes or build additions onto the homes we have to get it. We can't snap our fingers like Mary Poppins and make a closet appear or grab our back hoe and dig out a basement. So what can we do?

WE CAN THROW STUFF AWAY!

Oh, wait.  Was that too abrupt?  Sorry about that.  Perhaps you might consider permanently relocating some of your belongings to a place outside your current residence in order to acquire more living space.  

I know, I know.  You just can't part with ______________.  I get it, I really do. I understand because I, like you, am human. 

We are in the same boat on so many levels. Holding onto stuff is just one of the ways we are similar.  We all do it, we just do it to varying degrees.  

My husband, for example, has an extremely loose hold on things and is a minimalist at heart.  Just the other day he burned a two-foot high stack of medical bills in our fireplace without batting an eye.  He is notorious for packing up toys and donating them while the kids and I aren't looking.  As much as I hate to admit it, when we try to identify the toys that are missing we are almost never successful.  Hmmm...what does that say about our toys in the first place, right?  

I, on the other hand, hold on a little tighter to things due in part to sentimentality and in part to my estimation of an item's potential use some time in the future. 

There is a closet in our basement filled with old frames, mirrors, and wall art because I might be able to use them in the future.  There are a dozen bins of clothes in the basement because we might have another baby. Obviously, this could get out of control.  That is why it is wonderful to have my husband's personality to balance mine. His way of doing things helps me to at least stay mindful of the things that we are accumulating.  That really is half the battle.  

So how does this apply to you?  Well, maybe you could at least begin to think about getting rid of some things in your home.  When the day comes that you do get rid of that thing, maybe, just maybe, you will surprise yourself and learn you don't even miss it.  

I unintentionally learned this lesson when we moved into our current house. Before we moved, we lived with my in-laws for four months and kept a lot of our belongings in a storage unit. My mother-in-law was a realtor at the time and she helped us stage our house to sell.  Before we began the staging process, she sat me down and told me to get out my "thick skin" and pretend I was her client, not her daughter-in-law.  I was not allowed to take anything personally. Gulp.  

My dear mother-in-law stripped my house bare.    

I remember going from room to room filling up laundry baskets full of accessories and other items that I had lovingly and methodically placed here and there as a sentimental newlywed. I tried to be strong.  Before the tears could come, I charged ahead in an intentional moment of acceptance and focused on the goal ahead--selling my home.

It didn't take long for our house to sell. During the week or so that we lived with it "show ready", I really learned a lot about myself. It was painful at first, but worth it. I absolutely fell in love with clean counter tops and streamlined decor. It was just so nice. By the time we moved into our current house I had forgotten what we even had in storage.  I had learned to live without all that stuff and if I missed it, I didn't notice.

And then life happens.  Time marches on and the stuff accumulates. Before you know it material things are closing in all around and sucking the life right out of you. Maybe you can afford it, maybe not. 

Being able to afford things financially is one thing, being able to afford them spatially is another. 

Does your home currently have enough square footage to comfortably and functionally house your belongings and your family?  If not, it may be time to down-size the stuff.

Perhaps it's big items like furniture that you don't really use or doesn't fit your space.  Maybe it's clothing or shoes or jewelry. Maybe the toys in your home have gotten out of control. Perhaps it is the garage that is busting at the seems. Maybe it's kitchen gadgets you never use or books you never read. Whatever it is, it's time to take inventory. 

We recently took inventory in our home office.* It had somehow become the most out of control room in our house.  It was filled with clutter and a whole lot of randomness.  In order to get to the point where we could move the desk we needed to clean out the desk.  Ugh. Who wants to do that, right?  We brewed strong coffee and then seized the opportunity of a second wind and a sleeping toddler and got to work. I promise, if we can do it, you can too.

Our home office before.

Our home office after decluttering.

Here's What You Do: 

Begin with one room at a time. If that is too overwhelming, start with one piece of furniture at a time.  A dresser, a closet, the hutch, a bookshelf, the pantry. Whatever your "out of control" area is, start there.

Establish Four Categories:  

1. Throw Away
2. Sell or Donate (items that do not sell may NOT re-enter your house)
3. Keep Accessible for Daily Living
4. Keep in Storage (basement, attic, garage, spare closet, or storage unit) 

Now, it's time for the hard part: going through your things.  If you can muster it, try to bust out a little drill sergeant here.  Ask yourself the hard questions and then be honest.  If you have a spouse, parent, or trusted friend who can help you, he or she will be oh, so annoying, I mean helpful for this part.  

If an item in question doesn't inspire you or find usefulness for your life now or in the immediate future, then get rid of it and don't look back.  

Items you do not use frequently, but want to keep due to sentimentality or future use need to leave your day-to-day living space and be placed in storage whenever possible.  This could be in a basement, a closet, an out-of-the-way dresser in a room you don't frequent, or an off-site storage unit.

Before you begin, remember that expectations are everything.  Expect to be frustrated. Expect to feel like you want to quit.  It will happen.  When it does, take a little break, grab a snack, go for a walk, whatever it takes to refuel and refresh and then keep going!  You will be glad you did.

If there comes a time down the road when you need that thing that you gave away, why not see if you can survive the circumstances without it? Or better yet, why not live by faith? Live by faith that God will provided what you need, when you need it. And if the thing you need is not provided and God is all you have, maybe it will be then that you learn He is all you need.
  
After all, God is what matters most and He doesn't care what your house looks like, He just wants your heart.  There is no better place to start than there. If you haven't already, create space in your heart for Christ to dwell. I promise, He is worth it. 

"Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap, 
nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  
Are you not worth much more than they?"

Matthew 6:26

"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, 

the evidence of things not seen."

Hebrews 11:1

"One thing I ask from the Lord, this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, 
to behold the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in His temple."

Psalm 27:4

"But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him."
Hebrews 11:6

*We are currently on the hunt for a couch and lamp to complete our home office redesign.  To see additional pictures as we make updates you can visit www.dwellinspired.com.